There’s nothing like being home alone on a Saturday night to make you question your life decisions. Why am I not more productive? Why do I not have a ‘career’? Why am I not more ‘established’? Why am I slowly turning in to my mum? And why am I so obsessed with swimming?
It comes down to being chronicly indecisive and the world’s biggest yes man. Do you want to try this? Yes. Do you want to live here? Yes. Would you like to try something new? Yes, yes, yes. Sometimes I think this is a postive thing, other times, a hindrance. Crippled by choice and overwhelmed by options I have remained living like a 21 year old graduate into my (almost) thirties. I feel like I’m getting closer to being a grown up though. I want a boyfriend and probably kids someday. Wow, 29 and I’ve finally figured that out!
More importantly, the dating challenge has hit a stalemate. I’ve gone completely off Tinder, but I need to push through. Realizing that the only man texting you at the moment is an 18 year old gap student (although he is very mature for his age and very good looking – oh Jesus!) from work is sobering to say the least. So, it’s time for new tactics. I’m going to get a hobby, one which includes meeting men, like rock climbing, cycling, or wood work, maybe I could try axe-throwing. I’m going to do some serious internet dating (ie on a laptop not my phone). I’m signing up to OKCupid and Match.com. Flirting online is a whole other kettle of fish than chatting someone up in a bar. Grammar is important, as is timing, and you can’t rely on looks or ‘chemistry’. It’s not easy, and unsurprising therefore that people now pay $900 for someone else to do it. I sometimes think that I come across better in an email than in person and so chatting online has never particularly perturbed me. However this isn’t translating into good dates or great Tinder chat I think I just come across as vanilla, or perhaps just a bit of a snore. I’ve never recieved a dick pic, I’ve never had any explicit chat, not that I would want that. I’m lukcy that Tinder, and I know I’m probably in the minority here, has never been unpleasant. Anyway, I am enlisting the help of my flatmate and her boyfriend with my online dating chat. They both slay it apparently, they actually met on it I recently discovered. A friend has also offered to set me up with someone. Well, why not?
This month I’ve also got into swimming. I find it relaxing and I can’t get enough. Not being able to use my phone probably has something to do with this and I love being in the water.
Here’s what else I would recommend you check out while you still can;
Watch: the Casanova ballet in Leeds, which rendered my chattiest friend speechless; an American in Paris in London (incredible- the words my Dad used and he NEVER uses that word), Get Out at the Electric in Birmingham, bloody brilliant.
Eat: Lamb, so, so much lamb – it IS Easter. We had Ottolenghi lamb lasagna with a crusty butterbean topping and Waitrose recipe card lamb with Samphire; Salt and vinegar Hula-hoops – finally made for adults in the new grab bag format – godsend; Carrot cake (I made a fucking carrot cake and it was delicious); vegetarian food at Mildred’s, even my meat-loving South African Dad loved the lentil burgers; Bella Italia in Bayswater, (it is fucking nice I tell you);a whole lot of Pastrami and pickles at Monty’s in Dalston.
Drink: Popcorn martinis; all the brilliant cocktails at Brickfields in Brockley; Aldi’s Organic Prosecco – Yummy.
Reading: I’ve been doing it, a whole lot more than I used to.Currently, it’s a Secret History by Donna Tart. I’ve particularly enjoyed these articles. How communicating online is affecting our real-life relationships. Lynn Barber, Bad Granny. India Knight on Sleep. Lucy Tobin on politics in advertising. I love reading about people’s daily routines on the back page of the Sunday Times Magazine and I particularly liked reading that Emilia Fox often has sausages and salad for dinner. Winner.
I also really enjoyed the Hockney, these are some of my favourites probably because I now bloody love swimming, and the one of his parents is lovely.